To be fair, vulnerability is a trait that is typically prized in women. Men- not so much. Although there is much desire from *some* women to see their partners as authentic human beings (complete with emotional vulnerability) at different amounts, most men of my generation still pursue largely stoic stances on life while anybody else is around. Being vulnerable in mainstream society is tantamount to gender role suicide. If there is anything that the world’s leaders have shown us recently, it is that traditionalist “macho” men have access to influence, money, power, have fashion models for wives and the opportunity to raise families (while having the occasional young mistress on the side), and are considered to both moral and intellectual authorities by an astounding percent of the population. Contrast that with the deviants who clash with the gendered norms of society , get labeled as “betas” or “girlie men” (sic), and with various homophobic insults- and are perhaps sought after by a small segment of the female population who are also at odds with gender stereotypes. At the same time, vulnerability and delicateness and a submissive mindset are lauded in women, and seen as ideal. Strong and confident women, though, are typically given all sorts of flack within both business and social media cultures. Folkways are in place by both men and women who instinctively chastise others who won’t and don’t follow the norms. I think Katie hit upon a great idea when she mentioned emotional flexibility as a trait to be cherished.
And in general “laugh at yourself, embrace imperfection and recognize that we are all just out here trying our best” is some of the better advice I’ve gotten all year. While some of it seems obvious, I think that we forget about these things while under pressure, and then dismiss the ideas when we aren’t because of it being “obvious.” I think forgetting to see the forest for the trees is also up there with magical thinking and forgetting humor, attempting perfectionism, and not giving others the same sort of freedom from blame as we give ourselves. (Which apparently is a really big deal to social psychology: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fundamental_attribution_error )

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